Parents who are just too embarrassed

Catnip

Catnip

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I remember Tyra Banks saying she could ask her mother anything -especially when it came to sex. Her mother not only told her the basics, but how she would feel and the more deeper stuff.

I never got that, so I was pretty jealous for a bit there. xP

My dad and stepmom were both very embarrassed for whatever reason, so whenever I would ask them about sex, they would tell me to ask again when I'm 18. A very, very stupid thing to say, but what could I do?

Anyway, how do you feel about parents feeling too embarrassed to tell their own kids about sex? Do you understand and agree with it? Do you hate it? Not care?

Let's discuss.

EDIT:
Do you think it's more important for parents to educate their daughters over their sons due to pregnancy, etc, or does it just not matter?

Yeah, this came up in a discussion and I thought to myself, I have to.
 
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I can understand why things like sex may be an embarrassing subject to talk about. It's kind of taboo in that, although we sexualize people (mainly women) in the media, coming back down to reality, it's more of a private matter that isn't necessarily discussed or even acknowledged at times.

While I understand why this is, I don't necessarily agree with it. I think that parents should have a little more confidence in their ability to communicate with their children. They have to realize that children really do look to them for guidance. The least a parent can do, if their child comes to them with questions like that, is be supportive in their curiosity and point them in the right direction; to some great resources that they trust. They should also tell their children that, if they do have any questions afterward, that they're willing to listen (or at least try to).

I'd say think of it like this, do they really want to give away the chance to guide their child and send them off into the world either uneducated or getting their information from a faulty source? I should hope not.
 
well.... i make it a point NEVER to mention sex around my parents because ever since i can remember my dad makes about 20-30 DIRTY jokes every time the subject comes up
 
Bun said:
I can understand why things like sex may be an embarrassing subject to talk about. It's kind of taboo in that, although we sexualize people (mainly women) in the media, coming back down to reality, it's more of a private matter that isn't necessarily discussed or even acknowledged at times.

While I understand why this is, I don't necessarily agree with it. I think that parents should have a little more confidence in their ability to communicate with their children. They have to realize that children really do look to them for guidance. The least a parent can do, if their child comes to them with questions like that, is be supportive in their curiosity and point them in the right direction; to some great resources that they trust. They should also tell their children that, if they do have any questions afterward, that they're willing to listen (or at least try to).

I'd say think of it like this, do they really want to give away the chance to guide their child and send them off into the world either uneducated or getting their information from a faulty source? I should hope not.
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Exactly. Some parents actually talk to their kids about it as if it were a joke too. I've always looked at sex to be something serious. Sex being fun shouldn't make it a game. So when parents do that, it bothers me slightly.
 
Bun said:
I'd say think of it like this, do they really want to give away the chance to guide their child and send them off into the world either uneducated or getting their information from a faulty source? I should hope not.
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As parents go, there is a possibility for them to become a faulty source too and stress too much on the 'you'll get pregnant/you'll get someone pregnant, if you have sex' point. It doesn't bother me that I didn't learn what sex is from my parents nor do I think that parents ought to teach their children, because it's not so much as who teaches it, but more on what the listener will do about it.

I think whether a teen is given all the facts about sex from his parents or any other person in authority, if he wants to have unprotected sex, he'll do it. I don't think I've heard of a situation when someone has gotten pregnant and blamed her parents for not teaching her. It still leads to personal choice. I don't think this responsibility falls that strongly on parents. I can also imagine how constantly embarrassing it would be after talking about it, but that's a separate matter.
 
Coco said:
As parents go, there is a possibility for them to become a faulty source too and stress too much on the 'you'll get pregnant/you'll get someone pregnant, if you have sex' point. It doesn't bother me that I didn't learn what sex is from my parents nor do I think that parents ought to teach their children, because it's not so much as who teaches it, but more on what the listener will do about it.
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I thought about that, and yes, you're right.

But I guess what I was trying to get at in my argument was that parents should make themselves available to discuss these things if their child wants to discuss it with them; not that they should be completely and utterly responsible for instilling knowledge (whether it's right or wrong) of sexual education into their child's mind.

There are plenty of other ways a child can get information about the subject, plenty of good resources out there that don't have to involve the parent.
 
I never once went to my parents for any guidance on that matter. To be honest people who make the choice not to wear any form of protection are just plain idiotic unless they're trying to have children.

There is enough sex talk nowadays among children as young as 12 that you really wouldn't be able to miss the 'condoms and the pill are to help you not to get pregnant' information.

I myself would like my children to come to me if they had any questions they needed answering. My own parents are very old fashioned and there's a locked door when it comes to that topic and I never tried to open it.

It kind of grosses me out to be honest how some parents and their kids can talk about it as though they were talking to a friend or their own partner. I think there are boundaries and that some people often cross them.

So to answer the question, I don't hate that I can't talk to my own parents about sex, nor do I care.

Also I think it's necessary to educate boys just as much as girls. It shits me off that boys think that they can just fuck off when they get a girl pregnant. If it were my son I'd be hauling his ass back to the girls house and showing him that it's his responsibility just as much as the girls.
 
I never speak to my parents about anything anyway, never mind trying to talk to them about my sex life. I never did have the "birds and the bees" talk with them when I was getting to "that age" either. To be honest I don't think I would want to, my family tend to be very private people and only ever really talk to each other if something major is going on. I couldn't imagine it being any different, I like it this way.

Though I do think it is good to educate teens about sex and it's consequences. Some parents just do not seem to be too bothered about what their child does. Though I don't speak much to my mother and I'm old enough to be possibly thinking of starting a family in the eyes of others, I know my mother and I hate the thought of me announcing I've knocked a girl up. I've got at least for another 4-5 years.

Anyway, to assume that because kids/teens who are open about sex and talk among each other automatically know of consequences and the right protection to use is very wrong. Kids/teens are very reckless and easily persuaded all it takes is one of their friends to mention "it feels better without a condom" or "you're to young to get pregnant" or some along those lines.
 
I never ever spoke to my mum about sex, she never brought it up, I never asked. So that embarrassment was never there. There was no way i would of asked though, it would have just been to grim talking to my mother about sex. No thanks :gonk:

I'm dreading Ellie ever asking me about it, I won't know what to do with myself. I can understand why parents/children would get embarrassed talking about it to the other. Thinking about your parents having sex....ewww..... although it's sensible to talk about it it wouldnt make me feel any less uncomfortable ¬_¬
 
I never once talked about my parents about sex. I never once took a sex ed class. Yet, I still managed to figure things out on my own. It didn't take my parents to teach my that sex would lead into pregnancy, and it didn't take a genius to figure out how it worked.

All it took were a couple of perverted friends and a huge assortment of context clues skills on my part. Then again, I was smarter than the average child (not to brag).

To be honest, I don't believe it to be necessary for parents to talk to you about it. I don't even think it would make much of a difference if they did or didn't.

All in all, kids have a way of figuring out things all on their own. However, it's up to them if they have the mental capacity to figure out, or handle the information responsibly.

I've known kids who talked to their parents and still turned out to be whores, and kids who didn't and turned out to be saints. It mostly depends on how the kids is raised in my opinion.
 
While its not entirely the parents responsibility to teach their kid about certain areas of sex, I think it wouldn't hurt just to be aware of what the kid knows. I mean I know by 9 years old I even knew what oral was. So kids hear about it a jokingly go over it but once the guy hits around.. 11-12 they become a hornball.. So I could see where unprotected sex would come up because the availability of condoms at that age is sparse. I mean girls hit it earlier than guys, so yea..

I'd generally discuss like birth control and condoms and being safe. I wouldn't go into the technical stuff of sex. That would just be wrong.
 
I never talked about sex when I was growing up. My mum told me about the Pill when I was 17 and advised me to go on it. She bought condoms for my younger brother, but refused to buy me a single one! When it comes down to sex, she is more comfortable talking to my brother about it then me. My dad freaks out about my period lol, so I dont go to him if I have any problems elsewhere lol. When I have pregnancy scares, my gran and mum are the 2 people I run to. My dad would hit the roof.
 
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