Original discussion- Tip's story

[Oblivion_XIII]

Well, here's where the feedback to Tip's story will be posted...

The story itself will is at this link
http://www.finalfantasyforums.net/original-works/the-story-rough-40536.html

enjoy

 

[Laro]

It was interesting, as the reader tries to figure out along with the character what's going on BUT, critically speaking, it would be better if you added more description. Both physical and emotional...

Well, anyway, best of luck and I hope I helped!

 

[Oblivion_XIII]

yeah, part one was more of an entrance, starting at part 3, it starts to get into the characters, their emotions, surroundings, ect.

 

[Laro]

yeah, part one was more of an entrance, starting at part 3, it starts to get into the characters, their emotions, surroundings, ect.

Oh, okay, thanks for clearing that out.
I'm looking forward to reading more!