Serious Everyone has problems

[Guernsey]

Sometimes when life is boring and typical, you mayt want to find an escape where you get to experience something else. Although I admit I take things and people for granted, I often tell msyelf that there are people who have it worse than we do and that is the truth but if I had a hard life I don't want people to have feel sorry for me when I am suffering. Of course, rarely anything in life is so clear cut and it may not always be that the people who live such situations such as a divorce, poverty or sickness may mecessarily be suffering in a spritual sense but soemtimes I often look at myself and feel as though that I shouldn't be talking of my own sufferings when other people have proiblems worse than I have. What should I do about things like this? How can I deal with this?

 

[Mitsuki]

This is better suited at Temple of the Ancients.

[Thread Moved]

 

[.Tifa]

Um not sure but guess you could always help others who you feel like need that help, your right- there is always one person who is more worse off than you are.. but maybe if you start helping those who need that help, maybe you could feel happy and proud and maybe not so guilty for those who are suffering much worse ?..

Sorry the question was a tough one..

 

[Shu]

Well considering your problems, I would say you should establish if they are trivial or if they will always be an obstacle. The second thing is if they are an obstacle, and you are not able to find self resolve, then probably just need insight from others. Just don't come off as complaining, just relay it like it was an every day conversation. I mean there are counselors in this world for a reason. They are just often there to talk too. Maybe you should give it a try, unless of course your problems are something others would not take a liking too.

 

[Dionysos]

I mean there are counselors in this world for a reason.

Truth that. And by my memories of what your troubles were from your other thread I'd suggest this as a good step if you feel powerless to help yourself.
Though I admit with some people going to see such people feels shameful and wrong but hopefully doing so might put you on the right path. It does make you feel weird going to see one though, but they are often a huge help in sorting personal problems.


There are many different types of problems. Yes people in Africa are starving, there are homeless people on the streets, there are kids trapped in a warzone, and these are serious and terrible issues and these people should be helped and saved. But that isn't to say that anyone elses problems or your own problems are not important. There exist internal struggles as well, and trying to fight your own mindset or personal problems can always be a struggle and makes it hard to function in society. If the problems mean that you are unable, or feel unable and hence are unable to function as a human being then you have every right to want to fix them. So don't feel ashamed at having your troubles.

I agree it is not good to constantly talk about your troubles with other people, even if you are willing to listen to their troubles, but a word with the right people or close friends or family might help you let it out, and possibly hear some advice or compliments that help you aim for a more promising future.

 

[blakstang98]

I'll admit that I'm a little confused as to what the question here is. I'll answer this the best I can. There is certainly nothing wrong with venting. Everyone at some point in their life goes through issues. Sometimes, you just have to tell someone your problems, and the person that is listening has to be willing to hear you out. There were times in my life that I wish I could have relayed problems to someone, just to get it out of my system. I never expected the recipient to listen and try to solve my problems, but rather just be there to listen. I've found that either a good friend or a companion was usually the people that worked best for me.

 

[idiotic idioms]

You know, every person wants someone to listen to their story. It isn't exactly a selfish act, but is a way of healing. We want people to be there who understand what we're going through, to listen to us. We need to know that there is someone there who will simply be a friend. It is very healthy to talk to people about bad things that happen to you. Yeah, of course there are a lot of people in the world who are worse off than you. I would feel really sorry for you if you had it the worst off. But that's not to say that your own problems are trivial. In comparison, yes, they are. But the thing I found out is that it's exactly as bad as you make it out to be. People with minor problems can still reach the same level of depression as the people who have major problems. It's all in how you react to the situation.

Honestly, I've been there where I thought the same as you. There are tons of people who have worse problems than you or I or anyone else here, I'm sure. I see it on TV a lot. But to restrict your own healing process because you're guilty about your own problems not being as bad as other peoples is ridiculous. Just be sure to give back what you take out, meaning that if you tell your story to someone, to get it off your chest, make sure that you be the listener for someone else when they need it.

It doesn't mean you necessarily have to give advice or anything like that. Just listen. listen and let them know that someone is there who cares about what they're going through.

 

[Midnight Memoire]

It seems to me as though your problem is not wanting to admit that you're suffering. Yes, everyone suffers and goes through their difficulties but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't feel as though you are going through something hard.

Sometimes you just need to talk about it, no matter how simple the matter may seem. Talking and having others listen is very helpful. We as humans enjoy helping others... I suppose it must make us feel significant or something of the sorts.

But never hold anything in. I should be the one telling myself that lol. My friends and family describe me as a soda bottle being shaken... Eventually I get opened and explode all over the place. That's not a good thing.

Here's my advice: Don't be a soda bottle being shaken! Just open up before you burst.

 

[Das Ende]

It's good to be aware of the troubles of others and make the line of separation, but ultimately as everything is subjective, whatever your problems are, either great or minor, if they cause enough distress or anxiety to be called problems, then they should, evidently, not be disregarded.

I think the problem which may give rise to such an issue, whether individually or universally, is not that which defines a certain situation or occurrence as problematic, but rather how people deal with it.

Still, we all have our ways to deal with our woes, and emotional chaos is not as easily dealt with as Japanese animation or television might have us believe.

 

[Sirsparrow]

There has been a lot of good advice given in this thread already.

There's a saying my mother told me when I was younger - "If everybody's problems were out on the road to be taken, you'd take your own".

Everyone has their own problems like you said, and some are 'bigger' than others. That's not to say that your problems are insignificant.

If things are really bothernig you, you should really tell a friend or someone close to you. Don't bottle it in. Obviously, use some tact as well. Like you'd hardly be telling someone who's father just died about how you're feeling a bit lost with what you want to do in your life etc.

But yeah, there are different scales of problems, and simply repressing them out of consideration for the bigger problems isn't the healthiest decision to make.