Girl likes guy who likes other girl

Daenerys

Daenerys

The Last Dragon
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Suburban hell.
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So like, the other day I was talking to one of my friends, naturally we were gossiping about someone elses love life (IE the fact that she just goes and makes out with someone who already has a girlfriend.) We got to talking about our own love lives, she complained what a mistake her last boyfriend had been and I said "I really don't care about love right now, it's not like anyone likes me xD" and she replied with "Oh I like you, admittedly more than a friend"

Which I guess is a good thing, we've gotten rather close recently (She only joined our school in like, october) and after she told me that she was all "do you like me?" "can you ever see us being close" I said yes, because I do like her a little bit. Butbutbut, then she asked the question, the answer to which I know is gonna come back and slap me in the face. "Are you over Becky then? lols" I lied and said yes...when I'm really really not.

So, girl likes guy who likes other girl.

But theres more.

She said she didn't wanna go out with me just yet because she still likes my other friend, and she doesn't "want me to feel like 2nd best"

So, guy (kinda) likes girl, who likes guy, but likes other guy more.

So really, we're both in the same situtation -

Girl likes guy who likes other girl more. and,
Guy likes girl who likes other guy more.

Yet the people we like more don't like us that way.

Beckys like, my best friend though, we've been through so much stuff together, and helped each other through so many stuff, there's a lot of baggage there, on both sides.

And the girl and guy, well the guy is one of my oldest and best friends, and he's not interested in her at all (he likes the other girl who made out with my friend who already has a GF)

So now, all me and the girl do is have really really really awkward conversations, and yeah...

=/
 
Nothing good can come from going into a relationship if you still harbor problems from a past one. And nothing good can come from her still trying to CHOOSE, which guy she wants to be with.

If she really liked you, she wouldn't have to choose, sounds like just little crushes. Maybe date and see how that goes, but as far as a relationship goes I believe neither of you are ready to commit to something like that.

But live and learn buddy, since part of you still belongs to another, deal with those problems and then when you can truthfully say your past that, then move on. No point in getting hurt more, and hurting others.
 
No, no, no.
Don't get into this.

From the looks of it, she's afraid of being your 2nd rate, and you would be her's.

Nothing ever comes from being second rate, a lot of unnecessary feelings get roused up as a result; such as jealousy and a dropping ego at the thought of being second rate.

I can not tell you how infuriated I was when a guy I dated kept comparing me to his ex. Mind you, it was always NICE things, but I broke it off with him and said: "There's not enough room in your thoughts for me. I want you to think about me, not how I relate to your ex girlfriend."

You can't really be in a relationship until you've let go of past feelings, because you'll be unconsciously subjecting that person to comparisons, and all that does is make you think more about the person you were with, rather than the one you're with now.

So, I can't stress how much I'm saying 'NO' to this.
I hope I was of some help.
 
WOW. That sucks for you man.

But I must... discuss a few things first.

Since when were 15 year olds sexually active?!?!?!?

Such is the woeful fate of our rapidly degenterating society, where more and more girls are becoming pregnant at the age of fourteen.

Sexual abstinence is becoming more and more important as it is becoming more and more abandoned in practice.

Personally, (and I'm not ashamed to say this) premarital sex is something I'll never do and I find it's becoming harder and harder to find people that think the same.

You should not hang out with this girl any longer. She is a foul disgrace to women and humanity in general. Just GET AWAY FROM HER!!!! Strange situations can stir quickly, and God knows what kinds of diseases she has already. I don't want you to catch anything from her.

Let her hit on you if you truly want the attentions of a disease-ridden screwbag. But don't you EVER return the 'affections'. You'll just be another tally mark on the bedpost. If she says you have a nice ass just say 'I agree' and walk away. That'll be sure to piss her off. Girls like her always see more in things than there really is.

And, if I ever catch wind that you are 'dating' this girl I will show you no mercy. I shall spam your email with messages about the rising tide of AIDS, Herpes, and more from Red Cross. I shall constantly plague you to get tested for contamination. And finally, as your last punishment, I shall send the flying monkeys to hound your sleep every night, and you shall be cursed with insomnia!

Have I made myself clear?

Good. That's very good.
 
seems real complicated huh?
awkard conversations can be a real drag, but better than something you'd regret.
just give it some time, it will kind of die down
 
Aerith said:
So now, all me and the girl do is have really really really awkward conversations, and yeah...

=/
Click to expand...

There you go. As soon as you said that, it mirrors what you truly feel about the situation. You may like her, but do you like her enough to actually commit to a relationship with her?

I already see flaws about the situation. First of all, be honest. Honesty is very important. You should have told her that you are still not over Becky. The fact that you didn't tell the truth tells me that yes, you do want to date this girl, but perhaps only because you want to know what it's like to actually date. By telling her, "yes, I'm over her" gives her a certainty that there could possibly be a relationship with you two - and you know that. But are your feelings really genuine? Because if it's not, then you probably shouldn't date this girl...

The girl was honest with you. She said she doesn't want you to feel 2nd best. She may like you, but not as much as your other friend...so, already I can see a messy and sticky situation. If you two really like each other, the relationship will happen and there will be no doubts, no "buts", and no harboring feelings for others.

Yes it's flattering to know that someone likes you, and actually almost fun to talk about awkward feelings between that person and you, but I don't think anything serious can come out of it just yet. Just continue being a friend to her and get to know her better.

And my greatest advice to you - don't let my post or others be the final decision. Reflect upon it, see the different angles...but in the end, make your own choice and act upon what you truly feel. It's your life. I'm just here giving you a friendly advice based on my own perspective.
 
Meh... Relationships are just too dang complicated and they normally end in a shitload of mistakes. If I were you, I wouldn't look too much into it. I've only ever gone out with one girl and already I'm leary of the girls around me.

As for abstinence. It's always a good choice, unless you want your life screwed up more in the future.
 
FYI, fer whoever said it, he's never actually been with Becky, but likes her. Not complicated. >.>

So, I personally think the reason you feel awkward when talking to her is partly because you both harbor feelings towards others and because your feelings towards each other are out in the open. Whilst it's true that going into a relationship with her whilst you both like other people more would be silly and end in hurt on both ends, don't rule out a possible future relationship.

You may just need to spend more time together... talk about stuff that interests you both. And you both need a little time to adjust to the fact that the people you like, don't like you in the same way. I've been in this situation before when I was with my ex. I liked another guy and didn't know if he liked me too. And then i told him and he admitted he liked me back and that he liked one of our friends... who liked me. Confusing... but yeah, when I broke up with my ex, me and this guy got together. He got over this other girl and i got over my ex...


Now I'm just rambling. <3 yoo twinneh-face
 
Okay, updates.

Girl I like was going to the prom with the guy she likes,

but,

it turns out he doesn't like her that way at all so she's no longer going to prom with him because "She doesn't want to go with someone who doesn't want to go with her"

Fair doos.

But then, last month she says to me on MSN,

"Oh, after the exams...if you're still interested, we can get together"

Then the next day she was bitching with my other friend about "Why doesn't he like me?" (on about her ex-prom date)

So...very mixed messages here =/

My oldest friend told me to "Go for it" while another of my friends said "She can't just DO THAT to people! I want to slap her!"

=/

Post probably doesn't make sense...welcome to my head :lol:
 
I wouldn't get into it personally. For one you both still haven't gotten over the people you left behind (if I'm right) and secondly she really can't go doing that to you. If she wanted to get with you she would have done it straight off and not dwelled on it to be honest with you and if she can't even get over the prom date that didn't like her then it really doen's seem worth it. To me it just seems a little awkward is all.

It's like she'll be getting what she wants out of you (someone to just be there for her because her first option failed), but you'll allways know that your second rate to her. And I don't want to be harsh in saying this, but if that boy kinda changed his mind then you may even be dumped and thats a good friendship gone, y'know?

I had a friend that was in the same situation as you. The girl she liked liked another girl, but that girl didn't like the girl my friend was interested in, so my friend was there to catch her when she fell y'know. It didn't last and the friendship kinda tore apart because they got into so many arguments. My friend couldn't accept the fact that her now GF liked someone else.

But if your cool with being 2nd rate, then you could allways try it, but if you realise that you don't like being 2nd rate, its just not gonna be good for you y'know.
 
I say leave it aswell. Your a rebound to her and she doesnt care if she hurts you or not. Shes still uspet over the other guy, so leave wel alone cause she'll just use you and not give a toss.

My friend is the same, she uses a guy who is in love with her ALL the time. And its sad as he knows this and yet hangs around her all the time.
 
~SapphireStar~ said:
I say leave it aswell. Your a rebound to her and she doesnt care if she hurts you or not. Shes still uspet over the other guy, so leave wel alone cause she'll just use you and not give a toss.

My friend is the same, she uses a guy who is in love with her ALL the time. And its sad as he knows this and yet hangs around her all the time.
Click to expand...
My boyfriend use to be like that intill he got tierd of it. It was his first girlfriend and she use to leave him and come back to him because she knew he was there, but he soon got tierd of it and you might do to, y'know?
 
Hmmm.
After considering this long and hard, I have to say no, I agree with most everyone else.
You should not compromise your romantic integrity for an easy lay that will ultimately be very costly.
 
You really seem to be in a pickle here OP, hopefully I am in time to offer some advice! As opposed to the rest of the thread I think you should try it with this new girl. Love is something that has to be nurtured and grown it doesn't just happen instantly. What you have with Becky could pale in comparison to what blossoms between you and this new girl. I doubt she likes your mutual friend and was just trying to feel out your response, don't let her down! God bless
 
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