Metro said:Well, he could be, if some health and safety campaigners have their way. A team of health experts have accused Santa of promoting obesity and drink-driving.
They say a fat, tipsy Father Christmas with no regard for health and safety sends out the wrong message to children and they want to give him a makeover.
‘We propose a new image for Santa to ensure that his influence on public health is a positive one,’ said researcher Dr Nathan Grills of Monash University in Melbourne, Australia.
He said the tradition of leaving a glass of sherry out for Santa could be seen to promote drink-driving.
‘With a few billion houses to visit Santa would soon be over the limit,’ he added.
Other dangerous activities he could be accused of promoting include speeding, disregard for the Highway Code and extreme sports such as roof surfing and chimney jumping. Despite the risks of high-speed air travel Santa is ‘never seen wearing a seat belt or a helmet’.
Dr Grills wants Santa to hop off his speedy sleigh and jog his way around the world, he writes in the British Medical Journal.
He also thinks the usual mince pie left out for him should be replaced with healthy celery or carrot sticks.
Santa also used to appear in ads for cigarettes in the 1930s but that has now been banned – thank goodness, or the Aussie researchers would have blown a gasket.
The charge sheet
Speeding
Taking time zones into account, Santa has about 31 hours to deliver an estimated 700million gifts on Christmas Eve. To accomplish this, his sleigh would need to be travelling at just under 1,600km (1,000 miles) a second.
Obesity
If he visits 156million homes and has a mince pie in each of them, Santa will consume 31billion calories – enough to keep him going for the rest of the year.
Drink-driving
Visiting households at a rate of 1,400 per second, Santa would be over the legal drink-drive limit in a flash if he downed a 25ml measure of sherry with each delivery. He would be more than 47million times over the limit by the end of the night.
This is a complete and utter joke. Santa is fictional and people will moan about anything nowadays! Its stupid they are going on about speeding obesity and drink driving. For God sake, he isnt fucking real! He is meant to be the jolly fat man, not some skinny bugger who can just about pick up a sack of presents. Whats next?? Animal rights stepping in for Rudolph?!