[V6] What's Your Mood?

[Miko]

Last V5 thread wasn't very old but you know, new year new you!

Forum rules always apply, but take a stroll through The Lifestream Guidelines for the nitty gritty of this section. I also encourage you to especially take heed of Posting & Forum-Etiquette in this thread, as small one-lined indirect posts to the topic aren't really encouraged. For example: "Life is meh"; "Just fine"; "Just another day in heaven" as a single-lined post is not ideal, so beef your posts up and let us know how you are!

Mood: Happy & Excited

Reason: New year, new mood thread! Anticipating lots of great things in 2022+ for everyone here at FFF!

 

[Six]

Mood:

Buffering. Everything's fucking buffering.

2021 was definitely a "wtf" year and that's how 2022 started too. Health scares galore. Seriously need to make it a point to stop stressing or at least stress less by the end of 2022. Not one for new year's resolutions, but perhaps more a personal goal.

I'm strolling the web looking for notebook charms I don't need, but hey, if I gotta stay relaxed a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do!

 

[Miko]

Mood: Tired

Reason: Family & I have been sick on & off since Thanksgiving. It's been very exhausting to say the least. My husband has started his day-shift position at his place of employment though and it's been a huge relief for us all, so that's been a nice break in the storm at least. I've had stuff that I've needed to do these last few weeks but I haven't really had the mindset to really sit down & do them. I've just been so drained both mentally & physically to do anything really, even the stuff I enjoy doing. As beautiful as winter is I'm actually really looking forward to spring this time around and really hope to get outside a bit more as I think that will be a real nice mood booster.

Now excuse me as I recover from being sick all day yesterday. I've haven't laid in bed that long in a loooooooong time, my body is so sore!

 

[Six]

Mood: ???

Not sure how to describe my mood these days. It's been an absolute roller-coaster, that I still feel I'm on, the past couple of weeks. Almost two months now. I feel like my whole life is upside down, trying to sort it all out, but perhaps what I really need to be doing is just accept that this is what it is currently. Grasping at every possible thing to somehow be the answer hasn't been helping. Google has been a nightmare as well, which is ironic as I've literally not been sleeping for ages now.

So yeah, fuck Google. Hopefully things cool down on my end soon. Trying to find some normalcy in things again but it's been hard, both physically and mentally.

 

[Miko]

Mood: Springy?

Spring weather has been slowly creeping in here a bit earlier than usual, and it's been well needed as I've been really suffering from winter depression on and off and really have been wanting to get out and walk more. (My area doesn't really have side-walks so it's not really optimal) This time of year always makes me want to do spring-cleaning type of things, I'm just still a bit winter jet-lagged so my focus has been across the board and sometimes not quite there. Been fighting off a bit of a cold as well, but nothing serious. So yeah, feeling a bit better than I was in January, that's for sure.

 

[Six]

Mood: Oof

Man, to say the past couple of months have been a rollercoaster would be the understatement of the year. Still unsure with how I'm feeling, but again, just trying to get some normalcy back into my life.

Kinda looking forward to making some changes and spring cleaning on the forum. It's about time, I suppose. Gosh. Bunch of slackers we have on board.

 

[Dr. Percival Cox]

Mood: Down

I'm in the middle of one of my I guess you could quarterly depression lows. They usually only last a few weeks until I forget about them and they pass. But man they suck while they last. This constant feeling of just being over everything. I barely talk at work which isnt good cause I'm a supervisor and I have to interact with people. I just keep everything brief and avoid it as much as possible. It's just a bummer feeling. I try really hard to push through and be positive, at least fake it. And I do periodically feel better but I eventually come back down. It'll pass.

My wife also isnt doing great with her mental health which has me worried. Covid quarantine from her job has definitely taken its toll. She basically just sleeps all day. I try to motivate her to do stuff but I also want to respect her and not be pushy. But I also feel selfish because I'm going through my own bad mental state and it's hard to help her with hers which makes me feel like a crummy husband.

Cant wait for this Covid nonsense to be over with.

 

[Six]

Mood: Exhausted

Mentally, maybe physically as well. Who knows. The past few months have been rough and completely depleted my mood in every way. It's difficult to think "Oh, things will get better", when every time you try and tell yourself that something else is added on top, or something new pokes its head around the corner.

So I've gone the petty route instead of self compassion, started looking at things from a "this person can't even do this and this, and here you are complaining" point of view, and it's helped a little, but clearly it's not the best approach to minimise your own problems.

Practising gratitude is supposedly a good way to change perspective, but I find myself to be such an enormous skeptic that I don't know how true this is. I mean regardless, gratitude isn't a bad thing to add to your habits, but... really? Does it really work?

Aside from that, my wallet is exhausted, too. Purchased just a little too many notebooks again but swore to myself and many others (accountability, lol!) that it was the last time I was ditching a half empty notebook. I did make one for forum notes, but ended up thinking it's a waste (lord have mercy), so I might change that up a little, who knows.

Considering I can still complain about notebooks things aren't that bad I guess, my morale has just been missing since the start of the year. Can someone please return it if they find it, thanks!

 

[Six]

Mood:

Gosh, I'm drained. It's been a while forum, it might be another while but who knows. Crazy hectic lives have to slow down at some point, right? R-right?

 

[sly]

Mood:

I bought Tiberius some new toys recently. Ribbons and feathers on a small fishing pole, basically. He really likes them and I'm glad, but now he wants to play all the time. Sometimes he even forgets to remind me to feed him because he's so focused on playing. He's very insistent that I stop what I'm doing several times a day. Like, two or even three times. I mean, it's crazy. Sometimes... I feel like I'm just his servant.

He's adorable, so I can't say no. Even if he understood, I don't think he would listen. He never hears me out.

 

[Coco]

Mood: ?!?!?!

Well it’s been a crazy few years since I’ve been here that’s for sure. I normally check in when I’m feeling down because this place really gives me a lot of nostalgia. My teenage years were a turbulent time but it was also a simpler one in the sense that I didn’t have much to worry about aside from homework and exams now and then. Anyway, too much has changed really but since I’m already down I don’t see what I’ve got to lose. And who would read this anyway?? So let me tell you what I’ve been up to since I was REALLY active here. I switched careers (which was good). Got married and had a daughter (also good). I moved to Canada (idk if that’s good yet. The weathers not so bad but it’s summer so we’ll see). I’m struggling with a lot of issues right now, mostly relational and existential stuff. And responsibilities. Man, no one equips your with enough knowledge and skills to take that on. But I do and am doing my best to cope anyway. Phew. Ok bye and see you again in a few months or a few years

 

[Jake]

I've been in a bit of a rut, lately. Maybe it's my real midlife crisis - and me shaving my head a few years back was just a sign of things to come. I certainly hope not! Hahaha. I just kinda feel a bit lost. Floating through life and not really seeing a purpose for it all. Not exactly sure why - I certainly don't feel depressed! - but I'm like... whatever. To most things. Just need to try and dig my way out.

I've also found myself a bit nostalgic about online and forum stuff. It's all just not quite the same as it was back in the day. Here and everywhere else. There are so many people I've lost track of, or simply grew apart from. I've changed so much over the last year or so, and I find myself thinking about whether those people have too. I miss talking about dumb things to people who share the same interests as me, in a way that's not really possible in real life. I don't know, it's hard to explain! Maybe I just need better friends in real life.

By all accounts I should be happy and perfectly fulfilled - I've been in a relationship for almost two years, we live together and have two cats, I have a steady source of income (more than I've ever had before) and a new car which I use to travel around the Tassie wilderness quite a lot... and yet I feel like I'm missing something. Something that I've had before, when I was happy. But I can't quite put my finger on what that was. Perhaps it's just unresolved trauma. I miss my grandfather so damn much - I really regret not being able to say goodbye.

But oh well, that's enough of a monologue from me. I'll make this post and then maybe someone will read it and then we'll all go on with our days.

Hope you're all doing well.

 

[sly]

You have to get a hobby that you can do when nothing in particular is going on. That's why I'm constantly doing computer upgrades. You can only do so much tv-watching in your boredom without your mind wandering into darkness.

 

[Miko]

Mood:

Stressed af this week, month, er, year. My grandma passed away a few months ago and shortly afterwards my neighbor's house caught on fire which was kinda scary. It's come with some weird challenges with my kid now that we've been discussing death a lot more as well as oddball dreams that involves fire that has scared my kid. I've been presented with a good opportunity to go back to work at a fairly easy-paced job but I've been stressing over if I should take it or not. Mostly worried over selfish reasons... I don't know, but it's been really difficult to think over. We just got back from a fun vacation thankfully, but I've got those sad blues you get as a kid like when Christmas is over lol. Unfortunately for me I got sick immediately upon return (literally in the car ride home) and have been trying to get better but it's been kicking my butt. The stress of everything has trigged this weird thing my brain does and I can hear random music outside that isn't actually playing again. It usually doesn't freak me out but it's been really weird this time around and I've been hearing more of it this week than normal, probably from all the travel & being sick.

so... I dunno. Just typed it out to keep myself distracted I guess. Hope everyone is well

 

[Six]

Mood: Drained

This year has been crazy. Non-stop nonsense since January. Where there's normally a ton of patience, I feel the fuse is just non-existent now. It makes me feel bad for the people around me, it makes me feel angry at the people around me but mostly I think it just makes me confused in evaluating myself throughout this process. I think there's too much pressure on me as a 32 year old, and I think sometimes people forget that I'm really just that - 32. I feel like I'm taking care of a family of 6 even though all of them are adults and I don't have kids - the responsibilities are endless. How is that a thing?

It can be really tiring and makes you feel quite alone with the burden of things. It's not something a lot of people "my age" will understand. Which is irritating in itself, to think some people can just live such careless lives.

Oh well.

 

[Frey]

Mood: Enjoy free time by making habits.

Whenever I have free time, I sit down and enjoy some good tea or coffee. Matcha tea is a good choice for me. Reading a book beside several pot plants is also great. I always try to imagine a quiet and peaceful place around me after work. Sometimes, I put myself in writing something that appears in my mind. During the study periods, we are trained to write down an issue of society or a review by the English language. To complete it you must read some books or go to school to learn valuable lessons. But then, you don’t need to worry about everything you’ve written down after graduating and getting a job.

Sincerely, I have no other ideas for hobbies than writing. Some people tell me I am not good at looking around and conversing. But many things not related to me just stick in my head when trying to fix that, so writing them down in Word is a good way. I feel normal even if no one reads or says something about those words. Indeed, my wife doesn’t understand what I am writing. She had once spoken Cetra, Cetra many times from my text and thought that I was practicing to advertise a kind of Japanese tea (It was just a draft before I decided to put the Cetra into a war against the Humans).

Thanks to a kind remark on my post from two days ago, I feel like I can express my feelings. I had considered quitting writing since I just do it as a pastime and not a type of work I needed to focus on, especially when I realized that I was writing fanfiction and therefore had to make everything reasonable. My free time isn’t much, never enough to play any long games to understand the kind of storyline. Instead, I have to read all the information on Fandom and other websites for search information, just like reading some books. The simplest method is to concentrate on all information that the game never provides, such as the main character's father or the history of a particular country, etc.. I imagine all of them crossed out in top-secret documents, while Fandom only shows clean records. Like Julian Assange said, “If you want to know the truth… no one is going to tell you the truth. They’re only going to tell you their version…” So for me, I will always consider everything I’m writing as a “truth” of my own, even if the next part of the game can tell us something new or not.

What is fact, and what is fiction? If someone speaks about all facts and fiction—false or not—so often that others are willing to believe, they will become the truth. And if a fact is never shown or different in a story, it'll become fiction for someone who has known clearly about the truth.

Well, I think it's enough to write something here. Now I would like to drink good tea and eat delicious bread. If you don't see any brutal scenes besides the fantasy things in a game, believe in that because its version isn't allowed to reveal.

And even though my writing might be true or not, please remember... it's just a fanfic.

 

[greenyxi]

Mood: Grand!

Reason: So I went out to the big city (Cardiff) yesterday and I actually spoke to people without too many reservations. Frack knows why I stopped caring so much what other people think but it was a good night out. We nearly ended up sleeping in Cardiff Castle for the night after missing the last train but luckily a rather over-priced taxi was found!

Going for a family meal tomorrow for my birthday (that's on Wednesday). It'll also be my last day off work for a week. Never quite know what to expect when going back to work :/.

 

[Ariel Mortroni]

my mood : a little tired and a little confused

after 2 years of staying at home and work , I got 3 job in same time since last month. it was added to my pre 2 jobs
I guess I am punishing myself somehow.
i know i should drop some of jobs i took , but it is hard for me to decide which one.
and i wanted to build a small house for my self, but it seems, it is a little more expensive than i guessed so for know as our great poet says :
if there isn't any golden container to drink water , you can using your hands for doing so.
i bear with my room for now.

 

[Six]

Mood: Worn out

Gosh what a negative year, it's been relentless. Monday and Tuesday I was dealing with some heart palpitations (?) if that's even what they were, freaked me out, only happened when being active or walking around. Called the doctor today, was gonna go for a holter monitor but I asked if we could wait because it's not been happening today, and knowing my luck... the thing's gonna register nothing until after it's taken off and it happens again.

She seemed to agree, so I assume if it was something she doubted or was more serious based on the symptoms she'd have me come in or have it done anyway. So... Meh. What a shit year it's been. It's not even a break in between either, which really wears on you mentally and emotionally. Doctor did say it could also be stress induced. Kinda hope it stays away, kinda hope it doesn't so we can actually catch it on a holter but... What a fucking nightmare this year.

 

[Miko]

Mood: x

I'm not sure if it's my overall health or just because my kid has been attending school, but I've been so sick on & off this year - more than prior years. I'm fighting a nasty cold again, but before the stuffy nose & the mucus started in I had gotten a really sore throat that resulted in my tonsils swelling up to the size of bombs

They also did this really cool thing where they basically looked like corn, but I'll spare you the rest of the gross & gnarly details. I got it checked out about 3 days in & the doctor took one glance with her scope and immediately put it back down in shock..

Anyway, been on antibiotics and now they're normal. Now I just feel like a giant booger as I try and get over the rest of the cold while only using one nostril to breath through.

Meanwhile I've got a lot of stuff to catch up on around the house. We've been working a lot inside & out as we try and get caught up, especially on yard work that has grown out of control since before my husband got off working nights. We've got a lot of trees in our back yard that have fallen, this year especially, and we're at the point now where we just need to have someone come out and do it for us. Our front yard was also out of control (it seriously looked like wild prairie land) but we've finally gotten ahead on that before I came down with what I assume is tonsilitis. Sucks for us though because we bought some paint & made arrangements with both time off at work & the kid to stay at his grandma's so that we could have a long weekend to do some painting & spend an early anniversary together. Instead we all spent it sick I'll see you all on the farplane