[V4] What's Your Mood?

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Ayyyyyyyyyyye im good tbh

Just like last friday i havent slept a wink. Around 3ish i think or maybe closer to 4am my brain went into overdrive and i sat up writing a short story til about 9-10am this morning. It was one of those rare times when every word came to mind straight away and i didnt have my stupid dylexic bouts where i mix up words and put them in the wrong order. I took some meds designed to increase yer brains focus. I wrote it off as a lot of shite cuz it was mostly caffeine in them but they definitely worked. I still cant play guitar atm due to the Carpal in my hands being too much these days but my brain was on overdrive so as not to waste a chance i jsut started playing out a story in my head. After 5 minutes i stopped and started writing it on the laptop.
Ive already planned out the whole story which i wanna cover over 3 parts Not a spontaneous idea i had but rather one i thought a while back inspired by life in Scotland and the UK. Its a short story about a teenager growing up in Scotland. His family are abusive junkies who have no love or time for him. If you aint helping me then piss aff. Them kinda folks. but things change when he meets a girl his age whos also going through problems too. Cliche story short whats too big for one of them alone they manage to face up to together. Its always something ive wanted to do but my motivation to actually write it out was lower than zero. I dont see me finishing it anytime soon unless miracles happen and my brain stays switched on like that for more days to come.
The thing is i love making up stories in my head but putting them onto computer or paper i find hard and especially boring unless i have that once in a blue moon drive i sometimes get where i can do anything for the few short hours im alert. Im a lazy speller and i dont particularly care to proof read shit cuz thats boring. But as long as someone could read it ( assuming anyone ever does ) I dont care. I wish i felt like this all the time. I would get a lot more shit done in life.

Also i yap n about having focus when im sitting here aavoiding getting stuck into the DIY cuz i cba. Double edged sword

EDIT: Sod it im gunna play some pool later. PLenty time to work on this floor later tonight 2moro and next week. I styaed in all yesterday like a hermit so il go out and socialise with the lads. A great man once said you cant rush great work before youv had a bacon sandwich. I always thought that was stupid but i only now understand what he meant by that
 
Mood: Semi-down

Just not really a great day, miss the pets we had to put down in 2014. It's almost a year since it happened, already... Just not a great day in general, really. Too much time on my hands which results into too much thinking. Meh.
 
Mood: Content. :ryan:

I'm thirsty and hungry, but I'm feeling good! I've getting in my routine eating plan so I'm feeling hella healthy! :neomon: I've also been taking vitamins and it's been helping boost my energy and what have you.

I'm glad that i'm sticking to it-- it gets hard to form a healthy habit :gonk: but day by day, i'll be feeling better. :cheer:
 
Mood: Concerned.

It is already week 3 of the new semester of uni and I find myself wandering into a pit of nothingness. I have been in the library for hours a day trying to come up with some interpretations of passages that I can present in class to have a good discussion, but I realised I didn't have it in me today to say ANYTHING in class. Luckily, the professor was not picking on people today, but my mind was definitely void of thought and I could have been easily terrified. I do think one of my professors is intimidating because she demands so much of us. I need to pull myself together and actually try to make sense of things, and since it is 3rd week of university, I had better start early on those coming essays. I still not sold on the idea of finishing at 8:15 PM on Tuesdays because my day just drags on forever. I now get to the library as early as noon, then I have a class from 2-4 PM, and then I have a 2-hour break until my next class, which drags on from 6-8:15 PM. It is frustrating, and the students in my program all look like dead zombies who do nothing but read.

More on my "concerned" mood though, some of our professors are saying the essays have not been that great lately and we really need to improve ourselves if we want some good grades. I typically get very mad if I get a B- or B on one of my essays, because I know I can do better. I have a huge presentation on Nietzsche coming up at the end of March so I really have to get my act together and do productive work. Video gaming is fun, but I am going to cut down on it. I am going to make it so I do not play more than 2 hours a day unless it is the weekend, so I can focus on my work more often.

Here are my priorities starting tomorrow at university:

1) Try not to worry too much about work and do my best, but stay focused

2) Leave video games for the weekend, unless I finish my reading and understand it well

3) Get started on reading G. W. F. Hegel's Philosophy of Mind and understand it.
 
Mood: As shit as a pig in shit

Reason: The car got fixed for over a hundred quid a month back and now all of a sudden it decides to have the exact same problem constantly. Losing the car tomorrow so that they can sort everything out once again. Or maybe they'll just do a 5 minute test and I'll have to go back there and lose the car for 2 days in a row!

Those sheep are getting a right good slappin' tonight!

P.S. If they try to make me pay for any of it when they didn't sort it out properly last time, they're gonna pay by having their throats slit. For reals.
 
Mood: Bit bummed out

Wanted to go back to the gym and due to a lot of stress on my side the whole schedule I made fell through. It's really hard to find the motivation to get myself to go when I'm stressing about so many other things. I know that once I go often enough and get back into a routine it's no big deal but the steps getting there.... ugh. Endless.
 
I'm great today :grin:

I woke up with a hangover but I've had nothing to do so I've just sat around in bed all day getting rid of it and it's been bloody glorious :ohoho: it was a really good night last night as well.
Watched a film, played some Skyrim, chatted with my housemates (who are much more pleasant to be around now their exams are over) and generally had a lazy day. Now I'm debating whether to head to bed now or wait a bit, since I had a nap earlier I'm not really tired. Me and my housemates are hosting a massive party tomorrow so that should be a good one as well. Then I'm off to London Saturday morning to go to the theatre :ryan:
Life's good at the mo. Back to uni on Monday though. Urghhhh
 
Great!

Ive had an extremely productive week thus far. The whole oil crisis is still affecting contracts at work but ive not let it worry me. 7 guys were paid off on monday but despite not having worked there as long as others i wasnt one to get sacked so im pretty..well extremely happy tbh. Its nice to think that they value me enough to keep me on when theres basically no work. All them days of grafting is working to my benefit i think.
Despite that ive been extremely productive after work. Spent the last 3 days working on the house til about 9pm at night and after that i just get washed then crash in bed. Im at the stage now where i only have to finish and paint my skirting boards and EVERYTHING is done. Obviously need to put all the furniture back etc but that's simple enough. Ive been living in my bedroom the last 3 weeks and im pure fed up of it now. Ive told the guys at work that its a party at mine next friday once its all up and sorted. Had a few nice pints after work today and despite feeling like i wanna go out and hit the town im willing myself to stay in. I have some rubbish to sort out with the bank so il leave the madness til next week. Just an all round positive day on my behalf and im quite enjoying the feeling of it. I also met a rather nice lady earlier whom i hit it off with so 2moro im gunna build up the courage to go see her again and see if she will let me cook her one of my 'famous' dinners.
Aye life is decent right noo :lew2:
 
Mood: Stressed again again again

Reason this time: Everything again. As soon as something goes away, something else comes along. The family issues seem to have calmed down because I think they noticed how it was affecting me, but now there are other things.

The Promotion: It's not a good thing like everyone says. Everyone else who has had this job has had to get used to being shouted at 200 hours a day by the torettes-infused manager (and everyone else) and the additional hours are unpaid. There is no way I'll see this promotion as a good thing. An extra 10 hours (bare minimum per week) of my life wasted somewhere that is eventually going to kill me off.

The Car: It is konking out completely so a new car is in the pipeline. This is partially a good thing, due to new toys etc, but at the same time it has been in our family since it was made (2004) and it's so hard to think of never seeing it again. I think I'm losing a pet...then there's the financial issue with all this.

The General Downness: I'm not sure where this is from but it won't go away. I'll wait this one out and see if it goes after I'm used to the new car and job.

Apologies: If you've found me offensive or in any way a pain around here lately. I've been incredibly unmelike and ready to pummel any turkey that crosses my path. Bare with me while I reprogram my circuits.

P.S. I need sun. And heat. And a holiday. The parents are going away in May/early June...and I think I'm gonna grab my budgie smugglers and hop in their suitcase.
 
Mood: Bummed out

Being 20...is a hard, new young age/stage. 20 is still young, but now with a few added responsibilities. Staying on top of school/your career, and now having to put yourself out there for love. As a teen, you met loves at school because you guys saw each other every day and stuff. Now it's the real world, having to put yourself out there in the adult realm in an adult sort of way. I've been thinking about that lately and it's confusing me. I feel like as of right now I don't know how to do it? But I guess figuring it out is fun, too. I just hope I don't stay single for too long...I don't wanna be too old before I find that "right" person. And I often wonder if I'm attractive enough, more-so personality-wise. *Worried* >.>
 
I'm doing well, I think! I've been chatting all night with a friend and it's so nice to talk with them, because honestly I barely leave the house. I can go for days without seeing sunlight, and it's not good at all. Been listening a lot to Wicked since I saw a bootleg of it (welp, it's never come to my country for a show and I doubt it will, so I have to rely on other people), and I've been looking into new musicals.

Also trying to tolerate my conservative parents due to the recent votes in Greece, new government, woo! But yeah my 'rents are not happy about it at all. I hope things go well. But I can't wait to get away from them.

In better news I'm getting small nudges to upload some stuff of mine on a portfolio site, cause I really need to, honestly. And I get so nervous, but I just gotta pluck up my courage and do it! Fingers crossed things go well.
 
Mood: Iiiiill

Reason: 'cause I aaaaaam. I've got a headcold and it's really hard to walk far lmao. Just a day of sleeping and Suikoden 2 so far, which has been amazing. I've been needing a weekend like this for months anyway, so this is giving me the perfect excuse to do so lol. I just can't bring myself to do nothing all day most days...which is odd considering my laziness.
 
I am great!

I had an amazing nightout with some of ther gentleman at work. Been a while since i went up town and last night was one of em nights where everything seems to go right...that was up tuntil i got in a fight with a Norwegian guy who i then made friends with and also shared a kebab with. I woke up this morning with a black eye and torn shirt...motherfuckers. Kebab a fight and a drink. Welcome to Scotland.
Feeling a bit hungover today but its amazing to just lounge about my living room. My living room i finally finished sorting out :ohoho: I was lapping up the comments about how good it looks from my mates last night like a dog. I spent 2 weeks pretty much living in my bedroom cuz the house wasnt in order. I dunno how i spent all them years in my room as a kid. Blame cod

Aye anyway good start to my weekend. Its snowing outside as i type this and i reckon its a night in now. Wouldnt mind grabbing a few beers and a takeaway later on and have a chinwag with some mates. Failing that il go back to watching attack on titan which btw has me utterly stunned so far by how good it is.

Also i need fags and lekky and i wouldnt mind a bottle of irn bru and a boost bar. Usually when im hungover i feel sorry for myself. I just wanna have someone give me sympathy and make me soup. All that good stuff you know? But that aint happening soooo.......i went to work and cleared out the spare bedroom. Gunna strip it down and decoarate it up. Keeping busy these days has been the key to my happiness. Dont wanna stay still for too long otr i overthink everything.

And overthinking things and running worst case scenarious is a road you dont wanna go down Six am i right?

Also still got a job and theres been a wee bit more work so alls good in my hood right now. Now im waffling on i shall fuck off now
 
Mood: Indecisive, angry/frustrated and anxious

I wanted to buy my sis a Coach wristlet today because it was on sale for $56's and she's into those. It was one she liked when we walked past it before, when it wasn't on sale. But as I was standing there, trying to apply for the store card or whatever to get an extra 20% off or whatnot, I realized that she hasn't been all that great to me lately, so why spoil her? I bought her daughter this cute scarf and ear muff set and she used it against me to say, "If you don't have money, then why did you buy that for my daughter?" She's been ANNOYING me lately, saying that I have money. Um, you know I only work in retail, right? Maybe I'm just smarter than you when it comes to saving so that, wow, I can actually DO SOMETHING NICE for you, and then you throw shade at me for it? Wow. I DESPISE it when people do that. So I figured buying her the wristlet would just send her the wrong message, yet again, in her own little mind, so I should just forget it and I did. But I'm feeling in the giving mood, too...especially since it's almost Valentine's Day, and normally my family doesn't do anything for each other on V-Day, so it would be a nice little surprise to give a few chocos and a gift here and there. But, really, my sisters aren't making me feel like getting them anything. I want to, because I'm thankful for what they've done for me in the past and the good things they [may] do for me now, but their behavior lately has just been off.

And I'm anxious because I ordered a purse for me a day or two ago and I can't wait for it to come!!!!!! It was SO cute!!!!!!!!!!! Online, at least. It better not have rips in it that they didn't take a pic of, cuz I saw something that looked suspicious, but I didn't want anyone buying it and figured if it's small enough I could just let it pass. Hurry up... >.>
 
Mood: Dead Bored

I'm in class now, and I swear this professor must be a newbie, as he keeps whispering when he speaks. He is just saying arbitrary things related to the topic here and there. He sounds uninteresting, and I can't for the life of me focus on his lecture. I'm so going to fail this course. :sad3:
 
Mood: Anxious, but productive

I saw the shipping status of my bag and it already left the state where it's from, on its way here...I thought maybe that means it should come tomorrow or the day after, but I think it may be more than that...

Tomorrow I have the best shift, 1st shift, which runs from 7am to 4pm. It's better because it goes by faster, and there's not much customers yet. Once the customers start pouring in, I'm already leaving, kekeke... :P The night shifts are so exhausting, and I had been getting those lately. Glad it's gone for at least tomorrow...

I felt like giving up today, not in a suicidal way, but mentally on this semester. Things have just been a bit complicated, and it seemed like I was kicked out of perhaps one of my classes, but I'm not. I've never been at such a low like this before. It took courage to check my semester schedule to see if the class was still there, but I looked and it was. Go me! It motivated me and gave me strength to get up and get things done. I don't want to be in this state anymore. I don't want to not believe that I can do it because I KNOW that I'm capable of excellence; I've given it before.
 
Mood: DISAPPOINTED!

My bag came and...ugh, omg - the adjustable shoulder strap: one side is sewn on the front while the other one is sewn on the back. The quality of the material feels low, and when I read the care tag on the inside, there was another tag below it. A WARNING sign! Something like, "We try our best to make quality products but because of human labor, this bag MAY contain lead" in which it listed freak'in CANCER as one of the effects! REALLY!?! From the photos on Ebay, I couldn't even tell that the straps were sewn on like that, and who the hell designs a bag like that!?! ALL bags that I've seen had the straps sewn straight on the sides, not one on the front and one on the back!!!!!! And that freakin CANCER sign!?! WTF!!!!! That wasn't even put in the photos! If I had known, I wouldn't have bought it. The design is absolutely cute like how I saw in the pictures, but how the bag was made is just crap. And MAY contain lead poisoning that can cause CANCER!? Never knew a bag could kill me unless it was used to wack me in the face! Urgh... >_< I am returning the bag. I feel sad, though, because I know I will never see the design from another again, but the shoulder straps and the health concern is just a bit too much for me.
 
Mood: Knackered as the English say

Had a fun day playing FFXIV with @Ethics and @Harlequin, but I've been awake for over (or close to) 20 hours and I'm dead. Hoping I can get a subscription going for next month as well, as mine is running out soon. Having a lot of fun this time around, definitely don't regret re-subbing this time. Also glad I purchased it for the PC, loads a lot faster but I still play with controller <3.

Anyway, what was I saying.... That I was knackered. Goodnight.
 
Pissed aff

I went outta my fucking way tonight to help a friend out who was feeling like shit and needing some company. Except he ended up acting like a complete and utter fucking bellend. Never have i wanted to hit someone so bad in my life whilst making excuses for him and keeping him safe all the time. Itd only make work more awkward come Monday. Either way i need to talk to him come then to tell him that if he hates Scotland so much then he should fuck off back to London. Il be fucked if im gonnae sit and listen to him cry and complain about this place whilst he lives and works here. Aye aye mate you moan about being lonely in Scotland then when we take you out you act like a total bam. Next time mate il take you to proper bars and see how long you last with the locals with banter like that. Please shaddap about London and being a geezer from the streets cuz nae cunt here cares. Wrap yer pish and act like an adult cuz your a fucking embarassment. When a group of scousers are sitting there shaking their head at you you know youv gone too far. Calling them Northern cunts when your in Scotland is just Ironic and sad ya fudd.

In other news i am very happy despite this as everyone ive told my terrible new joke too has laughed. Its the best worst way to break the ice ever.....but it works :ohoho:
 
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