When did your life suck most?

Five years ago, when my father died I was devastated. We were very close you see.
And now, that I've lost the greatest love of my life.
I feel empty, like I have nothing more to do in my life.
That's all though.
 
I tried to think of what to write for this some time ago but never got round to it. I could never decide between two periods of my life, so I'll briefly mention both.


The first is when I was about 12 and both my grandparents on my Mom's side passed away. It was my first experience with death, and these two were almost second parents for me. They were a great influence on my life and having them dissapear shocked and confused me. It didn't end there though, my Mom grew distant from the church, and my Dad followed fast.

It isn't so much that I really wish we'd continued going... I always hated going, and hey it meant now I'd get every Sunday morning free. But it meant that everything I had grown up comfortable with as a child had suddenly been thrown out of the window all within the same year. I came to conclusion that God and heaven was just another Santa Claus joke, created to keep children sleeping soundly without crying at night. I know this isn't true, and it isn't just to keep children happy, but I came to that conclusion. The seeds were sown in this era for all my insecurities. I suddenly didn't understand the world and was forced to accept that it is an evil git.




The second is now. I'm sort of losing touch with what it is to be human more and more. I'm quite the recluse on the whole. I suck at communicating properly with most people other than a close group of friends. It's not so much about confidence anymore, though that does play a role. I've just forgotten how to exist, really. I'm working on it though. I've just realised now that I'm getting older, and I haven't had my youth yet. :ness:
Also, I'm at Uni etc, but I can't get a job because I'm that naf that as soon as people see me / interview me they tell me to sod off (well... they don't but they may as well).

I came to the conclusion sometime this year that I am not destined to enjoy life like other people. I watch people go about their business etc effortlessly being awesome. I know now that that conclusion was really wrong and was essentially me giving up. I just have to try and get out of the mess I myself (and also life events or perhaps some freaky mental condition) have got my mind into. It takes time to break those mental barriers I have built, but I am actually doing something about it. :gonk:
 
2007 & 2008

Had to move High Schools and it was quite far away in a different city almost and was away from friends and was missing out on the fun times/ great moments that they were having. They would share everything that was happening on bebo and it was just hard to read what was missing out on. Not to mention parents were going through a divorce had had to listen to them fighting/ shouting whenever was in the bedroom [hiding xD] not to mention that the new High School was terrible and disliked every moment and just wanted the year to be over as quickly as possible. Everyday would arrive at school and would get kicked/ pushed and even people tried to push me downstairs so would fall down them/ get paralyze by falling down them. They were cold and just didn't give a shit about anybody elses wellbeing..

Used to spend everysingle lunchtime in the library until joined a gang and started becoming the leader of that gang and sadistically enjoyed watching people getting beaten up/ bullied upon / and causing trouble within the school's cafeteria..

Then started bunking school because just couldn't take it anymore. Think when started getting sexist remarks from a man from Iraq in one of the classes just couldn't take the school anymore. It was hard enough to avoid falling down stairs let alone hearing " Your weak and stupid female and you shouldn't even have a education '' everyday..

Used to hang out in Town alone and just try and avoid getting caught anybody but at that time didn't give a right damn. Then in July things just got worst. Grandmother died and just was even more crushed and couldn't handle death and was new to death and just didn't know how to deal with the emotions and just fell deeper into mental depression.. then got a infection which made taking/ riding the bus difficult because would be worried that the infection would trigger while was riding the bus in public..

So started bunking even more and think only ended up taking 1 or 2 classes.. and during one would just cry through it uncontrollably...

In 2008 was fully deep within depression and was even suicidal and even tried to commit suicide both times during 2007 one including bagging my head on a brick wall..
And tried to work in a health service office and it was just as worst as the High School
People there just used my mental illness for extra credit. They would break me down and then would try and recover me when the Boss came back to look good in his eyes.

Spent most of the time cutting self in the bathroom and just got Mind- fucked by everybody there consistently and was backstabbed by everybody and could trust nobody. Usually would think that was friends with somebody and could share information with them but then the next day it turn on me, and now because of that shit have troubles/ issues trusting others. Even close Friends/ Family and have broken down twice because of it. Remember whenever had a breakdown in 2008 the people there would just tell me to " Fuck up " which dug the hole even deeper..

Oh well that place was sucky. Mean the main Staff were themselves and the boss was a 60 year old sicko who had a disturbing crush on me.. >__>'';

But the worst thing about 2008 was my grandfather dieing he was like- my true Father since my real Father is like a manipulative ass.. so it was liking loosing a Father..

2007 & 2008 were just plain sucky and if had a choice to get a refund from going through all that crappy shit. So would get one..-__-
 
probably when my girlfriend dumped/brokeup with me.....
 
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I guess this thread isn't too dead. My life would seriously have to have been at it's worst, freshmen year QQ. I was all over the place with girls and it ended up pissing a small group of them off, in which case they got one of their boyfriends to call me all pissed of and threaten to kill me, not fun....
 
When my parents broke up when I was around 13, so around 4 or 5 years ago. A lot of it was probably down to how young I was so I wasn't really able to fully understand the whole breaking up situation and not being able to live with both my mother and father as well as brother and sister, however, my mum and dad are still friends now anyway and I see everyone in my family nearly every day anyway. I think what made it even worse is that it wasn't expected either, all I remember is walking home with a flat tyre on my bike is the pissing rain and my dad telling me my mum had left, however, there was no hint ever that it was going to happen.

Regardless, I probably have a better life anyway now and still see everyone, so all is good. :wacky:
 
Life is'nt always happy y'know people can rip you off for ya cash or someone you love can be taken away at anytime and nobody tells you how to act so we can only just "react" to things. Ive known all my life that oneday I will be alone the last of my kind as those I care for crumble and wither and old age eventually takes its toleon me in 3 or 4 hundred years or so..... ooooh a cookie!
 
Wow...after reading several of these posts, it almost seems like an insult to put this down. Honestly, my life has never sucked. The biggest problem I routinely face is boredom and uncertainty regarding exactly what I want to do with myself in the coming years.

I have a loving family, I'm healthy across the board, have great friends, and am well off financially despite some hefty tuition costs I'll have to address when I finish school.

But...if I have to go back to the time when my life sucked the most, I'd probably have to go back to high school. I despised those years. I was anti-social, untalkative, lazy, and constantly in a poor mood. I'm not sure why. I hated being at school (horrible people there for the most part), but I don't like to think that I was thin-skinned enough to let something like that affect me so severely. Ah, well. I've changed considerably since then, so it's all good.
 
Gee, where do I even begin?

The first time I'd think would be when my mum and dad got divorced. I was only 10 years old at the time, although it took two years for it to be finalised. Living with my mum and two sisters all alone was pretty crap, but we managed through for a while. Then came along the idiot that ruined my parents' marriage. I never found out until a year ago that HE was the reason they split up. HE had an affair with my mum and made our lives a misery when I was a little older.

When my sister was 14, he hit her after a huge argument and she walked out on us. It was a huge blow to us and I was going to follow her, if it had not been for her talking me into staying. Since then, she's been living at my dad's and has done well for herself. She's speaking to us again, but still hates HIM. As do I hate HIM, too. I've had so many arguments with him over the past two years that HE was the reason why I moved out and went to live in halls in uni this year. Living with him had been hurting emotionally and made me feel ill, so it was no wonder I wanted to leave. >_>

There've been other times I've had my life suck the most. I've had a few relatives dying throughout my time. The first one was almost fifteen years ago, although I hardly remember it. Then my granddad (her husband) died five years later because of a heart attack. I could never forget that night, but I wasn't able to mourn until years later for some strange reason. My great auntie died of cancer almost five years ago and I cried for weeks. The biggest blow was when my granddad died almost three years ago. He'd been getting a lack of oxygen to his brain and even forgot who my grandma was. I remember seeing him a week before he died and the doctor said he was getting better, but he still died. That was very hard to come back from. I cried most of 2007 because I never got a chance to say goodbye. It's been nearly three years since then and I still find myself teary at times even now.

Result days at college were never great either. I'd get crappier grades than I'd thought, but somehow I'm at uni now and don't have to worry about that anymore. So that actually turned into something brilliant.

I could go on and on about how much my life has sucked, but then again, we're here to enjoy our lives, right?
 
Hope Estheim said:
When my parents broke up when I was around 13
Click to expand...

My parents just broke up, and I'm 13
Weird o_O
Worst part of my life was the 6 weeks that I couldn't eat OR rink ANYTHING, not even a crum, and I had to drink this horrible liquid
I had a Bowel disease, and I still have it, so my life still sucks atm
 
I don't know i can say when my life sucked because it still sucks now. If anythings changed its that i don't really get my hopes up anymore when it comes to situations i want to turn out well. They all turn out exactly what i predicted they would be. I'm not as social as i was before, mainly due to various reasons of which i won't delve into because there's no point in doing so.


But if theres anything good that came out of my crap life its joining this forum. I like being here, even though i still feel like i don't belong here.
 
Both my grandfathers died in 2004. My mother's father died one April morning alone in his carehome. He and my grandmother never spoke to each other for years. My grandmother always hated her, and would never let her husband live with her. They could have been divorced, but my family never believed that divorces are in anyway beneficial. The story of why my grandmother hated him is rather long, but he died that morning on his bed perhaps from misery. I just couldn't eat after hearing the news. I abandoned food altogether and I was nearly anorexic. I was an 11 year old girl at that time so it was horrible to hear such horrible news.

Then my dad's father died 3 months later from cancer. That was nearly the final straw for my family, especially for me. My second grandfather was lucky. He died with his family around him, and he wasn't alone. I fell to pieces immediately. I saw 2004 as being a cursed year. I started to fall behind at school and I lost the urge to speak to people.
 
I currently suffer with low self esteem, trust issues, and anxiety. I'm also somewhat of a masochist.

Although my issues are important to ME I find others issues more pressing then mine and believe I must proove my worth or whatever till I'm accepted as a human being and a friend.
 
Id have to say two years ago when i learned i was adopted, i went through a month and a half when i just wouldnt speak, not to my stepsister, my stepmother or stepfather, i still havnt fully recovered from that but i maintain a close relationship with my stepsister because she didnt lie to me she didnt know, my step parents did although im not mad at them because they raised me it was just so damn tragic
 
Hmmm I've got to say my life sucks now. 2009's just been terrible. I started off the year with a crappy birthday, then horrible exams, went through a couple of months okay, but at the end of April my grandma died. May came and I just broke down crying at an anime convention because my ex was there and I still felt attached. Later on he found a girlfriend, convinced me he still loved me when he was with her and he couldn't make up his mind for who he wanted to be with. He'd go back and forth and I was tired of it, so I had a couple of months of heartbreaking devastation from June to October. I moved in July to this small hick...cowtown because my dad got a job here, so I was taken away from my friends and the big city I loved. I don't really do much anymore, I stay home and I barely go out except for school.
 
My life is great. Honestly, I wouldn't change anything, and any problems I have at the moment are so insignificant, mainly because they involve things that I won't give a crap about within a few months.

This was really put in perspective for me when a friend of mine told me that his brother was on and off of drugs, and he really broke down. It was obvious that this was something that had pained him for a long time. Within a few minutes, however, he was back to joking around and being generally happy. Honestly, if he could deal with THIS with a smile on his face, then I could deal with my insignificant problems with a smile on my face.

Ever since then, I simply don't complain. I realized how great my life is, so I don't complain, and I would never trade my problems for someone else's.
 
I'd say my life was probably at its lowest in 2006. I was doing my GCSEs at the time, and I don't think I have ever been so stressed or nervous about anything else. I practically stopped eating entirely and barely slept throughout. Then I had to wait three months for the results, and I spent those three months worrying about them. Everything turned out alright, but that didn't erase the months I'd spent preparing for and then worrying about them.

After that, I started College. A few weeks in, my leg started to seize up, refusing to straighten, making walking generally painful. Long story short, I had a blood test which revealed I lacked pretty much every vitamin needed to live and was severely anaemic. I wasn't expected to live to see my 17th birthday. I spent a month being pumped full of vitamins and iron with the threat of being sectioned in hospital hanging over my head the entire time, which didn't do much to improve my distress about the whole thing. As it was, I was in the local surgery every other week, having blood tests done, being recommended to psychiatrists, dieticians and pestered to go into hospital. I couldn't walk properly at all during that time, and had to use a cane or someone else to get around. When I was finally allowed to go back to College, I'd fallen rather behind - I had to drop one of my AS levels to be able to keep up with the others, and I wasn't allowed to do much walking for the rest of the year and the beginning of the next, when I was "discharged" from observation, as such.

All of this started about a decade prior, when I had my appendix removed - I was in hospital for two months and my diet took a considerable turn for the worse - but it all came to a head in that year and almost killed me. I still have issues with my health, but they're not as severe as what they were back then. I don't think I've ever been in such complete and utter despair, and I'd rather not repeat the experience.
 
high school sucked alot for me...

i live in a little hick town thats quite litterally run by jocks and their farmers parents... i was pretty much the ONLY kid at my school that was openly gay. quite often i was spit on, shoved into lockers, beaten up and called all kinds of interesting things.

at that age i also was to immature to know how to handle with something like that and i didnt one of the stupidest things i could of ever done, i tried to kill myself 12times(thank god i was very inefficient at that) and ended up in a mental instatution for teens.

that was.. god... i think 6yrs ago lol looking back i regret making those stupid descisions but now that im older i realized one thing... shit happens lol
 
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It's suching at the moment.Wow,how unexpected...Actually it started sucking 3 years ago and still does.Must be cause I'm still a teenager and I'm in the process of finding my identity and blah-blah.Wish it was only this,but it's mostly cause of my family problems.I fight a lot with my sisters,and they fight a lot with each other,it's really hard to live in harmony.Actually what it harder is changing the situation,something I'm trying to do.The summer of 2009 I realized that I didn't want to feel anymore the way I felt,so decided to change it.It's true that it's working,although it's quite exhausting.Lately with school and not having a lot of free time I feel like I'm braking the promise and it's started sucking.
Now I believe answering,helped me a little and I believe that things will get better.
For me that's my story for now.
 
This topic is really a good read. No offence, but it's good that there are other people that have had it rough couse sometimes I wonder if I was the only one.

I think it all started in second grade when I was harassed, bullied and toyed with . Being called a homosexual at a age when I did not know what it was nor did I know that I would in the future have an affection for boys as I have for girls. Years went on and it continued and continued, teachers being pricks and principal just didn't care until I exploded and threw a couple of chairs at a student.

Time passed and I entered College with my now ex-bestfriend and several other people that I cared about. Seing that the college year I had ended up in complete misery after I found out my ex-bestfriend was a lying backstabbing piece of garbage trash and have been telling everyone I have been doing the nasty with my other male friends.

Then good times again when I started to tell the friends I had gained in college that cared for me that I was Bisexual and they did not care what so ever about my sexuality, but the dream ended as the college system screwed me completely over and decided that I was not allowed to change my application for college so I ended up not getting a spot for the second year.

I then entered a depressive state, went through anorexia and lost alot of weight (kinda happy for that).

Now I have finally managed to grab a hold on the ledge of happiness and hopefully it will be awesome.

And to anyone who reads this and have a rough time with life sucking massive old socks. Keep going guys, couse there is a light in the end of the tunnel.​
 
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